Blah.

Man this week… has been rough. Really, really rough. The crazy amounts of snow are just adding to the roughness but emotionally this has been a terrible week for me. At least 50% of it is thanks to PMS, but in the spirit of keeping it real I’m just struggling with a lot of personal issues in my life right now. Some days are better than others but this week it has been one thing after another. Getting out of bed is a part-time job to me right now. I just feel depressed before I’ve even turned off my alarm, unless I’m going to teach a class. I’ve had a migraine that started late yesterday afternoon and hasn’t quit. Add on to that eating like total junk and consuming WAY too much sugar and caffeine and I am a walking ball of irritability. Not my best look, ya’ll. I’m just really fried from all the things in my life that just aren’t bringing me any form of happiness. I’d love to open up about it more but I really can’t, just know I am definitely on the journey to finding what I need to get rid of in my life to be happier. It’s just a lot easier said than done. Especially because I’m not rich or come from a rich family who could support me. Ya feel me?

I was supposed to be leaving tonight to take the bus upstate for the weekend but the road conditions are terrible so I rescheduled for tomorrow morning. I am looking forward to a few days of no work, getting my hair done, seeing my family and my good friend Rachel for her baby shower.

On a happier note, I got to go to the SELF Magazine offices in Times Square on Tuesday night because I was chosen to be a healthy food taste tester! How rad is that? A few of us got to chow down on various different hummuses, low-sodium turkey, crackers, sweet potato fries, and raspberry sorbet, all of which were. If you are a reader of Self, you are probably familiar with their annual healthy food awards issue. It’s my favorite! I love reading it every year because it opens me up to new healthy foods that I probably overlook in the grocery store. I can’t wait to find out the results because the raspberry sorbet I picked is SO delicious, I don’t even have words. I was in the dairy-free taste testing group so everything I ate was devoid of lactose. Great news for my stomach and bowels. TMI.

This week’s workouts have included… teaching one spin class, and no running since Sunday. Pretty much waving my hopes of good spring half marathons goodbye (not really, that’s just the PMS talking πŸ˜‰ ) My left hip was so tight and painful for 2 days after my last treadmill run though and I couldn’t even make it to 1 mile. At least I’ve eaten froyo twice this week? Ugh.

How do you overcome being way down in the dumps?Β 

Anyone else struggle on the treadmill physically? Why does it want to destroy my hip?

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25 thoughts on “Blah.

  1. Aww sending you a big hug from the other side of the world ( New Zealand) I know exactly what you mean as I have been feeling exactly like you this week, its been a struggle to even get to work all I want is to sleep all day on the couch, My best friend arrives tonight from Australia , so am looking forward to a week of fun πŸ™‚ I’m PMSing as well so doesn’t help, Hope your weekend is fab πŸ™‚ xx

    • AHHH have so much fun with your best friend!! There is nothing better to get you out of feeling like crap than a week with your bestie πŸ™‚ Hope we can make it through this week of PMS… only to endure it again in another month! hahah! πŸ™‚ xoxo

  2. Overcoming the dumps… Man, that can be rough. There are times when it’s easier to just give in to the dumps and start over fresh in the morning, be kind to yourself, and just veg. Other times, I find that I can talk myself out of them–do something I don’t want to do, but that I know will be good for me–painting, exercise, cooking. Something. I’ve also found that making lists of what I’m thankful for helps keep the dumps at bay!

    • Love that you mentioned starting over in the morning… that’s exactly what I just emailed to a friend of mine. Hitting the restart in the morning is just what I need to do! Tonight just needs to include my bed and some trashy TV, and most likely some sushi πŸ˜‰

      • That’s so funny! And your plan sounds perfect. Just let yourself enjoy it! Sometimes I give in, take a night like that, and just feel guilty the entire time, which, as my husband reminds me, defeats the whole purpose!

  3. I totally get how you feel even though everyone’s journey is different. Some days just getting out of bed is a major accomplishment, other days it’s not so bad. The recent weather and PMS never help. The thing to keep in mind is that there have been more accomplishments to feel good about than disappointments to dwell on. The weight you have lost, the races you have run, and living your dream in NYC all show you that you are in this for the long haul. Don’t let the little setbacks get you down, they are just tiny blips in the big picture.

  4. Hey Jen! πŸ™‚
    Sending you a lot of hugs all the way from Cali. I totally love your blog, we almost always match up on thoughts and moods (that’s not weird at all..lol) But I myself have been feeling a little blue. I do have my periods where I get really down for many reasons; work, school, living hours away from home, supporting myself financially. Some days its a fight simply to find the motivation to get out of bed. I usually try a combination of things that I hope can help you :). 1) I Re-read every card I’ve ever received praising my general awesomeness lol or expressing what I mean to my closest friends and family, even mentally going over something someone has said like a nice compliment helps. 2) Listen to all of my favorite songs and they’re not always “happy” songs, sometimes you just need a song that gives you permission to feel the hurt. 3) I also have really long conversations with the BFF who knows me so well, and after which I feel a little better 4)Read/listen/watch anything that has inspired me in the past 4) watch funny videos/clips of shows/movies that make me laugh and finally them most important part that helps for me is praying. I don’t know if you are a spiritual person but this really helps me feel less afraid and more strong. There is a clichΓ© that rings true and that always helps me when I have a cases of the blues; nothing last forever. Just remember whatever hardships/heartbreak you’re going through it will not last, because nothing ever does. Anyway, sorry for the essay. I’m an English major so I guess I get a little wordy. Sending you a big hug all the way from Cali πŸ™‚

      • Lol you can visit and kick my butt out of bed every morning. Originally I’m from Los Angeles, but I moved to The Bay Area 2 years ago to work on my Bachelor’s degree. Northern California is amazing, very beautiful. The weather is amazing, I wish you could see Fall here….its amazing πŸ™‚ It cheers you right up if you’re having a bad day πŸ™‚ I hope I never have to leave Cali πŸ™‚

      • I WANT TO MOVE THERE SO BAD!! This comment just made me want to even more! Next few years I have to even if just for a year. Ive been out to visit once and we spent most of the week up in the Bay area and I loved it so much!!

      • we should exchange places! lol I’ve always wanted to live in New York at least for the Fall season πŸ™‚ I don’t know if I’d be able to handle Winter as I’m a true Cali-girl who can’t handle temperatures below 60 degrees lol. I live in San Jose which is a forty-five minute drive from San Francisco :). If you do come visit out here I recommend checking out Big Sur, if you haven’t been its so beautiful and has the most incredible scenic trails πŸ™‚ Come over and enjoy the Cali-state-of-mind lol πŸ˜‰

  5. aww sorry to hear you’re not feelin so great these days. Talking to my family, friends, even better seeing my family and friends always makes me feel better, and watching something funny or just talking to someone who can make you laugh. Hopefully you’re weekend back home will help! I hope you get there safely!

  6. Jen β€” Love and happy thoughts coming your way from Ohio. I’ve been reading your blog for a while now and I think one of the things I like the most about it is the varying range of emotions that you share from day to day, week to week. Ups and downs are part of what makes us who we are. You’re generally so positive in all of your posts – you sound like a fun, out-going, happy-go-lucky person – and only knowing you through your blog, it’s easy to think that you’re like that all the time- but that’s not realistic for anyone! But when you share posts like this, it lets all of us know β€œhey, she’s normal – just like me.” Hope you get to feeling better soon and remember how many people you have inspired, and will continue to inspire!

  7. Your post said something that struck me. You are living in NYC and work in fashion, correct? Nowhere is the distinction between the “family supported” and “self-supported” more apparent than NYC and fashion. Having attended fashion week this week its quite apparent,
    and I wish you the best on your journey. Its not an easy one.
    On the upside, I will be spending the weekend in NYC and you inspired me to try some city running which I have never done before. Staying on the upper East side so I’ll map a run from there. Have a good weekend!

    • You are SO.RIGHT. I could go on and on about the politics of the fashion world but instead I say with confidence that where I am within the fashion world is not where I want to be for a day longer (but, money. womp.) and thats where a lot of my depression comes from. Did you end up running here?? I want to hear all about your trip! πŸ™‚

  8. I’m so sorry you are going through these tough times. PMS doesn’t help when there are a bunch of real stresses and challenges happening. At least there is a silver lining with SELF Magazine. That experience sounds really cool.

  9. I wish I knew the magic answer for you, but I just know it’s a big step to just get started on the path. Lots of well wishes to you!!

  10. I feel ya girl. Lately I’ve been more down in the dumps than I have been in a LONG time. When I get stressed out, I end up getting just straight up sad…like you said, getting out of bed is a part time job within itself. It’s better than it was a few weeks ago (though things are still pretty sucky) because I’ve been talking myself into happiness by thinking things like “the pain is only temporary.” And I’m reallllly trying to not let the not-so-good parts of my life affect the parts that are good (which can be really hard for me). Copious amounts of money would surely help….ha! Hang in there, girl. Any who, that whole taste testing thing sounds like the greatest gig ever. Are there such thing as professional taste testers? If so, I want to be one of them.

    • I hope youre feeling better lovey!!! The sun is out today and its 39 degrees which feels like 100 so i feel soo much better at least for today! I’m the same exact way with letting the bad effect the good and sabotaging myself! Can we just start our own business where all we do is taste test and workout? Awesome.

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